The last day of a legislative session is always filled with mystery and intrigue.  But this year’s is breaking all records on those two counts.

First off, what happened to yesterday’s agreement on the state budget?  We were told that House Democrats and Senate Republicans were in substantial agreement and just needed to “tweak” it by a hundred million dollars or so.  That should be a piece of cake in a $28 billion budget.  But now, 24 hours later, nothing has been accomplished. 

Republicans want to reduce the amount of new money for schools (Note, that isn’t CUTTING schools, it’s reducing their NEW money.)  But Democrats say no and insist on finding the hundred million elsewhere.  Except that Ways and Means Chairman Bill Crawford says there isn’t that much elsewhere to trim.  So it would have to come from schools, something for which Democrats will not stand.

 All this because Republicans have suddenly decided that the $1.3 billion surplus that Gov. Daniels has said is his bottom line all session is now not enough.  They want $1.4 billion.  Is that something they’ve come up with?  Or is it Daniels stirring the pot at the last second? 

Meanwhile, what is happening with the unemployment bill?  Yesterday we were assured there was a deal.  Now, once again, Republicans are talking about tweaking.  But tweaking what?  If it’s the no-cut-in-benefits provisions, Democrats will flush the whole bill.

And, of course, there’s always that big mystery.  What’s happening with the C.I.B. bailout.  We keep hearing from sponsors that new ideas are being circulated.  But what are they?  And are there any that might excite anybody.  Here’s an early prediction.  Without a last-minute stand by Marion County lawmakers and/or Mayor Greg Ballard, legislators from outside Central Indiana will just go home and let the C.I.B., the mayor, and the Colts and Pacers stew in their own juices.

  So Mayor Ballard has now weighed in with his C.I.B. bailout plan.  That makes three:  Ballard’s, Sen. Luke Kenley’s, and Rep. William Crawford’s.  Although, since Kenley is essentially giving way to Ballard, it’s really two.

  Ballard’s plan removes the touchy issue of again raising the Marion County food and beverage tax…this time from two percent to two and a quarter.  (Okay, that’s the official description. But I’m sorry, as long as a restaurant meal costs me a two and a quarter percent tax on top of seven percent sales tax, it will be in my mind, and I think in most people’s minds, nine and a quarter percent.)

  But it adds a rental car tax increase to replace it.  And it leaves other parts of the Kenley plan intact…the increase on tickets to events at C.I.B. facilities, the innkeeper’s tax increase, and the expansion of the Professional Sports Development district, where all sales taxes go to the C.I.B., to include the new J.W. Marriott hotel.

  The interesting part of the mayor’s plan is the alteration of the alcohol tax increase.  Instead of a statewide doubling of the tax, counties would be given the option of doubling the tax themselves.  The key difference there is that, under the Kenley plan, it’s a state tax that would be distributed to counties on a population basis, no matter how much the tax actually brought in from each locality.  Under Ballard’s plan, the money would be returned to each county that enacted the tax on a dollar-for-dollar basis.  So counties which consume alcohol heavily would get more.

  That’s especially beneficial to Marion County, not because we residents necessarily drink more, but because we have more visitors.  More visitors, especially sports and convention attendees, means more alcohol consumption.  So Marion County would get considerably more revenue from a usage-based distribution that one based on population, which doesn’t give it credit for all that visitor imbibing.  Estimates are ten to twelve million dollars, versus eight million under Kenley’s formula.

  Of course, some people will complain over this new wrinkle.  Bars and restaurants in Marion County which are far from the C.I.B.’s downtown facilities won’t like a doubled tax on their drinks, especially if they’re in an area like 96th Street, which is right across from restaurants in Hamilton County, which may not hike the alcohol tax.

  All this should make for a fun debate.  Although not nearly as much fun as watching city and state leaders squirm every time we ask them, “Have the Colts and Pacers actually agreed to give ANYTHING to the cause yet?”

It would be too easy to turn this story into a metaphor for Mayor Greg Ballard’s approach to fighting crime in Indianapolis. Way too easy. And crime isn’t funny, anyway. Nope, not at all.

Ballard was in Detroit for the NCAA division one men’s basketball final four. Detroit police said the pickpockets were likely in town for the same event, where more than 70,000 people paid as much as $150 for a ticket at face value.

The statement said Ballard was walking back to his hotel after Saturday night’s semi-final games at Ford Field when he stopped to assist a man who appeared to be suferring a seizure on a sidewalk. When the mayor stopped, two or three other men surrounded him and stole his cell phone from his pockets, the mayor’s office said.

Good Samaritan narrative aside, I think someone probably needs to keep a close eye on the city coffers to make sure that none of the taxpayer’s money ends up in a Nigerian bank account any time soon.

Well, the three dreaded letters finally surfaced at the Statehouse this morning. C.I.B. As in Capital Improvement Board. As in, will state taxpayers help the C.I.B. dig its way out of the mountain of red ink it faces in maintaining the Circle City’s sports and convention facilities? A mountain of red ink caused largely by the sweetheart deal with the Colts that gives Jim Irsay a cut of everything short of Girl Scout cookie sales if they’re within a mile of Lucas Oil Stadium.

Senate President Pro Tem David Long, (R-Ft. Wayne), this morning listed, without prompting, the C.I.B. finances as an issue the legislature will need to deal with during its closing days. He didn’t give any possible solutions to the problem and said it’s something that needs to be hashed out. But he did give a couple of interesting parameters for formulating a deal.

One, taxpayers outside Marion County probably won’t be asked to participate. Long said there would be resistance to a statewide tax dollar solution for the capital city’s sports finance problems. Of course, there’s lots of resistance INSIDE Marion County, too, mostly from people who believe they’re paying enough already and that the Colts ought to give back some of the largesse they managed to negotiate away from the Peterson Administration.

Which leads to point two, which is that Long agrees. When I asked him point-blank, “Should the Colts participate in any funding solution?”, he said “Yes.” He also said the expected things about Irsay being a great owner and Indianapolis being lucky to have the Colts. But the bottom line of his comments was that the Colts ought to give something back.

The final days of the legislative session were already going to be exciting enough with a recession-stricken budget and an unemployment crisis to be solved. A debate over bailing out the C.I.B. will just be the icing on the cake.